As the Winds Change
by ruflylover
Summary: Elizabeth McCord is allowed a weekend off after her time in Iran and she begrudgingly takes it. The family retreats to their home outside of the city and as Elizabeth tries to relax and heal, her attitudes about her job begin to change. Will she return to her duties as Madam Secretary when Monday rolls around or will she resign the position and reclaim her former, safer life?
1. Chapter 1

Enjoy this short multi-chapter fic. Original characters belong to the show.

Xoxo, Kate

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

The biting chill whipped in through the barn doors as Elizabeth heaped another flake of hay through the window of the stall gate. Her horse nickered in appreciation, his warm breath filling the crisp air.

"Good boy, Jack," she hummed, reaching in her gloved hand and petting his soft gray coat. It was moments like these she wished she had never taken the job. Standing here, bundled in her warm jacket, breathing in the scent of fresh snow and sweet oats. She relished just a moment more in the silence until she felt a familiar pair of arms wrap around her thin waist. A smile danced across her lips and she let herself melt into the warm body now standing behind her.

"Mmmm, there you are, I've been looking for you," Henry murmured, nestling his face in the crook of her neck. Elizabeth closed her eyes and moved her head to the side to give her husband better access. He kissed her gently below her ear.

"What are you doing out here? Isn't the idea of this weekend to rest?" he mumbled into her neck.

Elizabeth huffed. "I just needed some fresh air," she explained, turning her body around to face Henry. She gently reached up towards his face to cup his rosy cheeks and he covered her gloved hands with his rough bear ones.

"Elizabeth McCord, what you need to be doing is resting. Inside. In the house. In the _warm_ house," he lightly chastised, a smile still playing at his lips.

"I'm fine," she stated simply, lowering her hands and visibly tensing. He noticed the subtle change in her demeanor right away. His wife did not like admitting weakness. Even if she had just been badly injured in Iran.

"I know, baby," he whispered, grabbing her hands, "But that doesn't stop me from worrying."

She paused, shuffling her feet. "Pain's a seven," she admitted.

Henry pursed his lips. That meant it was at least an eight, "Should I cancel on Kelly and Jacob? They were going to drop off a casserole, bring the kids, and hang out for a bit."  
Elizabeth perked up. The idea of company actually appealed to her despite how uncomfortable she felt. Anything to take her mind off Iran was a welcomed distraction. Anyway, she knew that Alison and Jason would love to see their old neighbors. The Anderson's daughter, Stella, was fourteen and was good friends with them both.

"No, no. Don't be silly. We haven't seen them in ages. When is Kelly due, again?"

Henry smirked, "She had the baby 4 weeks ago, honey."

"Shit! Really? Oh god, shouldn't we be the ones bringing the casserole, then? I've been so out of the loop…"  
"And no one blames you, babe," Henry interrupted, leading his wife back into the house by gently putting pressure on the small of her back.

"Don't say that, Henry! There's no excuse for being a poor friend," she argued, shimmying out of his grasp.

"Hey, hey now. Don't worry. I sent flowers from the both of us. I got you covered," he assured, stepping in front of her before she walked up the steps.

Elizabeth placed her hand on her husband's chest and let out a deep sigh.  
"What would I do with out you?" she grinned. Standing on her tiptoes, she kissed him deeply. She wouldn't have stopped either, but her back seized up and she was forced to lower herself back down. She stifled a moan, but Henry was all too perceptive regarding the body language of his wife.

"Let's go get you comfortable on the couch. The Anderson's will be here within the hour."

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

Not even two episodes into "Friends," there came a knock at the door. Henry paused Netflix as the kids came shuffling down the stairs having heard their guests arriving.

"They're here! They're here!" Alison shouted excitedly, skidding across the hardwood floors in her socks with Jason not far behind.

Elizabeth hit the 'off' button on the remote and headed for the door, intercepting Alison as she slid towards the entryway.

"Chill," Elizabeth chuckled, squeezing her giddy daughter into her side and pulling the knob open.

The Anderson family stood on the other side, a warm pie dish in hand and smiles upon all their lips. Greetings were quickly exchanged and the night was underway.

After dinner, the two families gathered in the living room for a friendly match of 'Dance Dance Revolution'.

"You're going down, Jace!" Stella smirked, pulling her black hair into a ponytail.

Jason rolled his eyes, "Oh, Anderson, you don't know what you're getting yourself into!"

As the two teens battled it out, the rest of the gang sat behind them cheering them on.

Kelly turned to Elizabeth, "So, really, Bess. How _are_ you feeling?" she asked. It was a private conversation between two friends. The others weren't paying any attention to them, too engrossed with the playful banter and uncoordinated movement that was occurring in front of them.

Elizabeth smiled but it didn't quite reach her eyes. "I'm fine, really," she assured.

"Bess…"  
"No, really. I should be asking about you," she referenced down to the sleeping bundle in Kelly's arms.

Kelly grinned and Elizabeth inwardly sighed that her friend had chosen to take the bait, relieving the attention from her mental and physical state.

"It's been amazing," she admitted. "I mean, it was a surprise, obviously. We aren't exactly the young and energetic twenty-five year olds we were when we had Stella. But it's been a blessing I would never take back. Milo is a perfect baby and Stella and Jacob have just been so supportive."

"I'm so happy for you all," Elizabeth said.

"Would you want to hold him?"

Elizabeth beamed and nodded, accepting the weightless infant into her arms. Her heart skipped a beat as she was transported back thirteen years ago holding Jason at just a month old. It seemed like a century ago, yet Milo seemed to fit seamlessly against her chest.

"You're a natural," Kelly laughed, watching as her friend's eyes lit up for the first time since she'd arrived.

"I guess it's like riding a bike!" Elizabeth chuckled, glancing over at her husband who had altered his attention from the game to observe his wife.

"Well isn't there a perfect picture," he smiled, gently squeezing Elizabeth's knee.

"He's previous, Kelly. Really, beautiful," Elizabeth whispered, stroking the baby's pink cheek with the palm of her finger.

"Thank you. I think so too," Kelly laughed.

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

After everyone had left, Alison and Jason had each retired to their own bedrooms to binge watch television on their laptops. Elizabeth and Henry were beginning to settle into bed for the night and Elizabeth could not seem to shut her mind off. Gunshots and shattering glass were the sounds she could hear as she lowered herself onto the soft mattress, but she fought them off with thoughts of the evening, instead.

"Gosh, Milo was cute, wasn't he?" she asked her husband while beginning to apply lotion to her toned legs.

"He was," Henry replied.

"And Kelly seemed so happy. Reminds me of a simpler time in our lives," she reminisced. Henry stayed silent, just observing as his wife bent down to massage the lotion into her calves. He watched her wince in pain as she overextended her back, most likely stretching her stiches.

"Stop, Liz," Henry muttered, "Let me." Henry leaned forward and took the bottle of lotion from her hands.

She sighed in frustration at her lack of capability to do even the simplest of tasks on her own. Collapsing into the pillows behind her, she let her husband take over. She allowed her eyes to shut as he gently kneaded her muscles first in her feet, then calves, then thighs.

She hummed in appreciation and discarded her glasses haphazardly onto the nightstand beside her.

"A girl could get used to this," she joked, resting her arms up above her head on the pillow behind her.

Henry stopped and permitted himself to be absolutely enthralled in the beauty of his wife. Her hair spilling over the white pillow, her chest rising and falling, finally letting herself relax even if only for a second.

"Let's stay here forever," he said quickly, "Let's not go back."

He expected her to swiftly shut him down, like she normally did when he made these sort of hasty, spur of the moment remarks. But she didn't. Instead she took a deep breath and looked at him hazily, tears pooling in the corners of her eyes.

She blinked them back and spoke, almost inaudibly she said: "It scares me, Henry, that when you said that just now I finally permitted myself to let a breath out I think I have been holding since the moment I fell to the ground in Iran."


	2. Chapter 2

Thank you for your reviews. They made me smile. Hope you enjoy this next chapter.

Xoxo Kate

Elizabeth turned over on her side and glanced over at the clock. It wasn't even five in the morning. The sun was just on the verge of rising, that orange hazy color washing over the snow on the ground. Her husband's shallow breathing was all she could hear. It should have been calming. But it wasn't. Not to Elizabeth, whose heart seemed to have changed its rhythm inside her chest, the intensity and speed of it's beating feeling foreign and unsettling to her.

She placed the palm on her hand in the hollow above her collarbone and forced herself to inhale and exhale slowly and with intention, waiting until she felt her pulse gradually decline.

Henry could sense the tension on his wife's side of the bed. He always seemed to be conscious of her sleeping patterns – he slept when she slept and woke when she did. Last night, just like the previous two since she'd been back from Iran, had been a fairly sleepless night for his wife, only being able to catch a few hours on and off, fitful breathing and sudden movements fragmenting the night.

Henry moved so that his knees were curled up into the backs of hers and her backside fit perfectly into his front. She flinched but then sighed into him. She never used to flinch.

He inhaled the scent of her hair and tried to speak, his voice coming out grittier than he's expected, he forced himself to clear his throat. "You okay?"

She mumbled a yes and he reached his hand under her shirt, splaying his fingers over ribcage, feeling her chest rise and fall steadily. He was all so keenly aware of her calculating her breaths. He pulled her closer until there was no air between them, until they were practically one body.

"Mmmm," she murmured approvingly, "Someone's excited."

"Don't pay attention to him. He can't help it when you're around," Henry groaned, referencing the early morning visitor that was now perked up and was pressing firmly against Elizabeth's lower spine.

Elizabeth ground her hips against her husband, "I'm surprised after twenty-five years and the same boring old behind, he still has this kind of reaction."

She turned her head and kissed he atoms apple gently.

"Elizabeth, I seriously don't think you quite understand the power you have over me."

Elizabeth laughed, and for the first time it was a real one. Not forced, not calculated, just uninhibited like she normally was with her husband.

"Should we get up and make some breakfast?" Elizabeth asked, turning over in his arms.

"It's just now five, we should stay here," he responded, kissing her gently on the lips.

Elizabeth covered her mouth, "You don't want to kiss me. I've got dragon breath," she giggled.

"I love your morning breath. I love everything about you when you first wake up."  
"Right," she smirked.

"I love the way you still have an imprint of your fingers on your cheek from where you tucked them all night." He touched her cheek gingerly. "I love the way your part is all messed up and the hair by your ears is all fuzzy." He fingered the tendrils framing her face.

"Shut up," Elizabeth swatted him playfully, intertwining her legs in his.

"Hey, I'm not done," he laughed, grabbing her backside and pulling her in. "I love the way your eyes are just a little bit brighter, like they haven't been tainted by the stresses of the day yet…" Henry stared at his wife now. She stared back.

"Henry…"  
"I like the way your voice sounds. It's all gravelly and low. And it really turns me on."

Her husband's words made her grin from ear to ear. "God, you're perfect. You know that," Elizabeth whispered before grabbing her husband's face and slamming her mouth against his.

They spent an hour like that. Doing nothing more than kissing and smiling and holding each other. Since taking the job as Secretary of State she hadn't had a single hour like this with her husband. The private moments, the intimate moments, the meaningful ones had been hurried and brief. She missed him and she missed how close they had been before this job. She wanted to give everything up for him. She _would_ give everything up for him. Last night she had expressed to her husband that she was considering her resignation – maybe not considering it exactly, but it had crossed her mind. It had crossed her mind more than once.

 _Flashback:  
"It scares me, Henry, that when you said that just now I finally permitted myself to let a breath out I think I have been holding since the moment I fell to the ground in Iran."_

" _What does that mean?" Henry asked, his voice hushed, his tone concerned and loving, maybe even a bit hopeful. He hadn't meant for his request to be taken seriously. He loved his wife and wanted her to be happy and if this job was what did that, he wasn't going to stand in the way._

" _It means that I don't know if I can do this, Henry. I've been thinking about what would have happened if it had been me. What if I was the one that had been killed in Iran? I mean it easily could have been," she choked. The tears were falling now, a stain forming on the pillow._

" _It could have. But it wasn't. We are so lucky for that, Liz." He took her hand and squeezed.  
"Yes, luck. That's the problem. It was luck this time, but luck is unpredictable. I could be taken out in a single moment and you and the kids would be left…drowning."_

" _But that's life, babe. It doesn't matter where you are or what you're doing- something could always happen. I could go out riding tomorrow and be thrown from the horse. We don't know these things but it can't stop us from living the lives we want to live…"  
"What if I don't want this life? What if the risk is too high? What if I can't live with myself for choosing a profession over my family?"_

" _We both know it's not just a profession to you, Elizabeth."_

" _I just don't know what to think anymore. Nothing in the world is more important to me than you and our children."  
"And we all know that, babe. You are the most important thing to us too. But when you took this job I know that you had us in mind, too. You didn't take it for the power or the money. You took it to make this world a better place for our children." He paused to stroke the hair from her wet face. "You're a strong, respected woman, Liz, our children know that and they look up to you and admire you for it. I admire you for it."_

 _Elizabeth looked up into her husband's loving eyes and saw nothing but support and unconditional affection. Her mind was racing and she was worried and scared and stressed beyond belief. However, at this very moment with her eyes locked with her husband's and his warm hands clutching hers, she felt safe and she felt like no matter what decision she made she would have Henry and she would have her children and with that in mind, she pulled the blankets over herself and her husband, whispered "I love you," and drifted off to sleep._


	3. Chapter 3

A/N: Thanks for the reviews! I'm the type of writer who gains inspiration if I know people are reading and enjoying. So when you're done reading this chapter you should let me know what you think! I am open to any feedback too. I'm just writing this story as it comes to my mind so if you have any ideas of where it should go, I'd be open to hearing about them! With out further adieu, here's chapter 3!

Xx Kate

"Stevie's here!" Her youngest daughter's voice came echoing up the stairs. Elizabeth quickly slipped on her robe and set her book down on the side table. She had been on the same page for an hour, reading and re-reading the same paragraph, not soaking in the words, her mind still in Iran, still in that room with the sounds of war buzzing in her ears. She was thankful for a real distraction.

Her eldest greeted her in the kitchen with an embrace and kiss on the cheek.

"You look great, mom," Stevie whispered into her mother's ear. Elizabeth chuckled, knowing she looked terrible and her daughter was just being kind.

"I missed you, baby." Elizabeth was happy to have her whole family in one household. It was her last full today before heading back to the city and she hoped that by tonight she would know what she was going to do.

"Pancakes, I've got pancakes!" Henry called out, interrupting her thoughts. Elizabeth pasted on a smile and sat down with her children at the dining room table. Today was going to be a long day

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

By noon, Elizabeth somehow found herself back in the barn. Henry had left her on the couch and had gone to take a shower, he had kissed her on the forehead, "Don't go anywhere," he had whispered into her hair. She had smiled, but his word choice had made her feel ill – like she was trapped, her feet stuck in shoes sinking into wet concrete. She had been thinking about her decision all day. She wasn't the type of woman who felt at ease sitting still. She didn't like stagnancy. She liked the motion of things, the way a challenge sparked something inside of her, the familiar feeling of unwavering passion that would seep into every cell in her being. That's what she thrived on: the challenge.

Perhaps that's why Elizabeth felt herself compelled to saddle Jack, to bridle him, to put her feet into the stirrups and mount the stallion. At first, she only planned to exercise him, walk him out in the arena, nothing more. However, as soon as she exited the barn and made her way into the snow-white field, she dug her heels into Jack's side, signaling him to break into a full trot. Pretty soon he was galloping at full speed, Elizabeth clinging to his mane and neck, tears whipping across her pink cheeks.

The air was frigid and the wind blew her hair back. She felt free, she felt alive. The world was quiet and her mind was blank for the first time in what seemed like a long time. She could breath again. She laughed as she raced through the tree line – uninhibited and wild. The idea that no one could hear her or knew where she was struck her as humorous and then terrifying all in the same moment and she began to cry. It was then that she realized her mistake. She slowed Jack and came to a stand still in a clearing. And then she felt it – the searing pain racing up her spine shocked her into reality. Without meaning to, she let out a yelp, letting go of the reins and reaching back to touch her obviously ripped stitches. In the same moment she felt the hot liquid with the tips of her fingers, Jack reacted to her sudden cry and startled, throwing her off balance. Elizabeth tried to grab again for reins, but couldn't quite grasp them in time. Jolting backwards, she tumbled to the ground, her hip making contact with an exposed tree root. This time she didn't make a sound, the impact taking all the breath from her lungs.

Elizabeth winced in pain and assessed her injuries. Her hip and back were throbbing, but other than that she was okay.

Elizabeth's mind flashed back to last night _, "It doesn't matter where you are or what you're doing- something could always happen. I could go out riding tomorrow and be thrown from the horse," Henry_ had said. Was this a sign? She couldn't help but wonder. Henry had been talking about himself, but it hadn't happened to him, it had happened to her. Luck was not on her side. How many more opportunities did she have before luck failed her completely?

Jack had run off and just as she was starting to worry about how she was going to get back home, the horse appeared in the clearing.

"Oh thank, god. Good boy, Jack," Elizabeth murmured, picking herself up and making her way over to the loyal animal. She struggled to remount, her back screaming in protest as she threw her leg over the saddle. Taking a deep breath, she clicked her heels and led Jack back to the house.

As she approached the barn, her husband was already by the doors yelling her name.

"Jesus, Elizabeth! We've been looking for you for an hour! You went out riding? What in god's name were you thinking!" He was trembling with anger as he helped his wife dismount. Right away he could tell she was in serious pain, and his fears were confirmed when she didn't immediately answer his worried protests. Elizabeth grabbed her husband's hand for support, her nails digging into his palm trying to explain herself through the astonishingly sharp sensations that were attacking her back and side.

"Henry, don't freak out –

"What the fuck happened?" He interrupted sharply.

Right there in the snow, Elizabeth peeled away her jacket and Henry's legs almost gave out at the sight of her white shirt covered almost completely in crimson.

"It's worse than it looks. Just ripped some stiches is all."

Henry gathered as much composure as he could muster, "Okay. Here's what we are going to do. I'm going to help you into the car, I'm going to call the kids on the way because they are out on the trails looking for you, and we are going to the hospital."

Elizabeth was grateful for husband's self-control, his calm demeanor helping her settle her own frenzied state.

"O-okay," she stuttered, tears finally gathering in the corners of her eyes.

"It's going to be okay, babe," Henry soothed, linking his own arm in Elizabeth's and supporting her weight. As they made their way to the car, Elizabeth limping and Henry practically carrying her, Henry deducted that something else had happened besides ripping her stitches. She was far too debilitated and was completely favoring her left side.

"How did this happen?"

"I-I fell off Jack," Elizabeth mumbled, through hot tears as she was helped into the car.

"Shit! Did you hit your head? Let's call the ambulance. Fuck," Henry rambled, digging frantically through his pockets for his cell phone. Henry's mind was racing. This was much worse than he originally alleged.

"No, no, I didn't hit my head, just my hip, babe. I'm okay, I'm okay," Elizabeth grabbed her husband's shaking hands with her own trembling ones and tried to gather herself and stop crying. She had to hold it together. She was in physical pain but she could tell her husband was just about ripping at the seams in emotional anguish.

Henry bit his lip and squeezed his eyes shut. "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry. I don't mean to be so scattered. You can't imagine how worried I was… Let's just go. I can get us to the hospital in 15 minutes if I drive fast."


	4. Chapter 4

A/N: Sorry for the late update, guys. It was my birthday week and I went to Vegas! Anyway, I hope you enjoy this chapter. I would say rated a little higher for language. As always, reviews are very much appreciated!

Xx Kate

Henry was right. It took 15 minutes to get to the hospital. It took another 15 minutes to get checked in and again another 15 minutes for the doctor to come in and re-stitch her wound closed. Sometimes it paid off to be the Secretary of State – things were done in a timely fashion and she was well taken care of.

"How you feeling, babe?" Henry asked his wife as they waited for the physician to come back in and assess her hip injury. Elizabeth grabbed her husband's hand and smoothed her thumb over it several times.  
"I'm completely fine," she lied, pasting a smile on her face that didn't quite reach her eyes. In truth she was exhausted, weak, and in a fair amount of pain.

"I call bullshit," Henry stated, pursing his lips in frustration.

Elizabeth huffed and attempted to laugh it off. He didn't respond to her humor and she rolled her eyes. "Okay, it hurts. It really fucking hurts. Is that what you want me to say, Henry?"

"Yes," he responded simply, "I want you to be honest with me, Liz. You took a bad fall and you need to take care of yourself – actually, _I_ need to take care of you. _Please_ ," he grabbed her hand more forcefully, "Let me take care of you."  
Elizabeth's eyes pooled up with water and she allowed a single tear to travel down her cheek. Henry wiped it away with his finger and smiled sadly at his wife. "Will you let me?" he asked gently.

"Y-yes," she choked. Henry kissed Elizabeth's damp cheek several times and she finally smiled genuinely. He kissed her again, this time on the lips, and then followed it up with several pecks to her forehead and then her neck.

They were interrupted by a knock at the door followed by Elizabeth's physician, Dr. Kelley entering the room. He smiled at the couple.

"Alright, Madam Secretary –" the Doctor started.

"Please, call me Elizabeth," Elizabeth corrected.

"Elizabeth," Dr. Kelley smiled, creases forming at the sides of his friendly eyes, "Let's assess that hip so that we can get you out of here. Your husband informed me that you took quite a fall."

"That's correct."

"And you landed on your right hip?" Dr. Kelley moved the hospital blanket aside and lifted her gown, folding it at her midline and tucking it between her legs. Elizabeth felt exposed and embarrassed. She reddened and nodded to the Doctor. Henry gave his a wife a reassuring smile and squeezed her hand. However, his smile quickly disappeared as all three adults caught a glance at Elizabeth's purple and blue side. Henry inhaled sharply and Elizabeth's breath caught in her throat – it was quite worse than she had imagined it, but it shouldn't have surprised her based on the amount of pain that was radiating down her leg and up her torso.

Dr. Kelley clucked and sighed audibly, "This does not look so good, Elizabeth," he admitted.

"I landed pretty hard, I guess…" Elizabeth confessed.

"Yes. However that's not what concerns me," the Doctor admitted, folding his hands and glancing down at Elizabeth's charts.

"What do you mean?" Henry quickly asked, suddenly becoming more worried that he had been previously.

"Well, what I mean is that it's not broken –

"That's good though, right?" Henry interrupted.

"Let him finish, babe," Elizabeth assured, squeezing Henry's hand.

The Doctor flipped a few pages on his clipboard, "Like I said, I'm not so much worried about a break, as I am the bruising. It's quite abnormal. And looking at your blood counts as well, there seems to be an abnormally high number of white blood cells as well. Now, before we start to worry, this could be a number of things…"

Henry and Elizabeth exchanged a glance. They were both highly intelligent people and already knew what this could mean.

"It could be cancer," Henry interrupted the Doctor.

"Henry –" Elizabeth tried to stop her husband.

"It could be Leukemia," Henry continued, his palms starting to sweat.

Dr. Kelley cleared his throat, "Yes, it very well could be. But before we jump to any conclusions, there are also other explanations that could fit your wife's symptoms as well."  
"Yeah, like infection. It could just be an infection from the lesion on my back," Elizabeth stated adamantly, more to Henry than to the Doctor.

Henry shook his head vehemently, "No. No. He wouldn't have brought up cancer if it were that, Liz. Would you have, Dr. Kelley?" Henry was beginning to get visibly heated. He had dropped Elizabeth's hand and was now pacing slightly, his brow furrowed, his jaw clenched.

"Well, no, Elizabeth is right. We can't rule out infection, or TB, or even stress can cause a spike in white blood cell counts."  
"See, honey. Stress. That could be the explanation. We all know I've got plenty of that," Elizabeth chuckled anxiously, trying to meet her husband's frenzied gaze. She was slightly annoyed that the Doctor had even brought this up without having done further testing first. She hated to see Henry like this.

Henry ignored his wife, he was far too agitated, "Stress wouldn't explain the bruising, Elizabeth," he snapped.

"Yeah, but a tumble off a horse would," she quipped in return, eyeing the Doctor, trying to get him to backtrack and calm Henry down.

"Didn't you hear what he said, _Liz_? Abnormal bruising. I mean look at that, god damn it!" Henry gestured violently down at Elizabeth's still exposed side. The bruising was dark and angry, the garish purple and blue hues turning green around the edges.

Elizabeth pulled the sheet roughly back over her body as the tears welled up in her eyes again.

"Okay, let's all take a breath,"Dr. Kelly intervened, "Let's not get ahead of ourselves. In hindsight I probably shouldn't have brought this to your attention before doing further tests…"

"Well that's for damn sure," Henry mumbled, his hands balled up in fists at his sides.

"What are the next steps?" Elizabeth asked, always logical, always clear headed.

"Well, I'm thinking we do a needle biopsy and aspiration of bone marrow while you're here…"

"Our kids are waiting at home, how long will that take?" Elizabeth interrupted.

"As long as it takes, _Elizabeth_ ," Henry answered for the Doctor. He was clearly upset and Elizabeth sighed in frustration.

"It will take about 20 minutes to complete, Elizabeth. But look, I'm going to give you folks a few minutes to talk it over and I'll come back, okay?" Dr. Kelley looked extremely uncomfortable as he folded his clipboard under his arms. The couple nodded and he exited, shutting the door behind him.

"Fuck," Henry breathed as soon as the door had clicked in place.

Elizabeth squeezed her eyes shut and visibly hunched, her body looking extremely small and fragile in the hospital bed. "I guess bad things can happen even outside of the Capitol," she mumbled, looking up and searching her husband's desperate eyes.


	5. Chapter 5

A/N: Just an fwi, this chapter is rated M for language. I didn't plan on it being this way, but I just really think that it's in character for Henry and Elizabeth to act this way. Angst is my specialty, after all ;)

Enjoy. xx Kate

"Fuck parallel parking!" Henry slammed his fist down on the steering wheel causing Elizabeth to jump and then shrink into the passenger seat. The cars' back bumper was wedged between two trucks outside of the sandwich shop on Main St, the front of the car still angled out into oncoming traffic.  
"I don't want a sandwich, Henry," Elizabeth mumbled gently, looking out the window.

"What?" He barked.

"I'm. Not. Hungry," She explained slowly, finally glancing up from her hunched position and meeting her husband's heated gaze. "Honestly, Henry. I'm exhausted. I just… I would love to go home and see the kids, take a bath, get into one of your old Marine's sweatshirt's and pass out."

Henry sighed heavily and rested his forehead momentarily on the steering wheel.  
"That's all you want?" He asked.

"That's all I want. Please, let's just go home." Elizabeth placed her fingers around her husband's knee. It tensed up and she squeezed it hard. "I know that you are scared…"

"Aren't you?" Henry had abandoned his attempt at parallel parking and cars were beginning to honk, but the couple was too busy to pay any notice.

Elizabeth was quiet for moment, not exactly sure of how to answer her husband's question. But he was waiting for her to answer and he wasn't going to move a muscle until she did.

Elizabeth took a deep breath. "I don't know what I am feeling," she admitted, locking eyes with Henry. He furrowed them in confusion and waited for her to continue. "That's the honest to God truth… I've been scared before, Henry, and that isn't quite the emotion that I would say I'm having at this moment. I've been scared before… I was scared when we found out I was pregnant with Stevie because I wasn't sure if a CIA agent had it in her to be a good mother. I was scared when Jason tried to climb that tree outside in the yard by that old fence you hadn't gotten around to tearing down and I watched him helplessly from the window as he fell and ripped his knee open on a rusty old nail. I was scared when Noodle told me boys were teasing her in school and one of them had cornered her in the hallway and threatened her… our baby girl." Elizabeth was choking on her tears at this point, her hands balled in fists, her nails digging into her palms. "But right now, scared is not how I'm feeling, and you know why?"

"Why?" Henry whispered.

"Because first of all, I'm pretty sure I don't have cancer. I just have this feeling, Henry… I don't have it." She wasn't crying any more. She was pulling strength from somewhere deep down inside herself, somewhere she had never even tapped into. She was going to be strong for her husband and she was going to be strong for her children.  
"Elizabeth, we don't know – Henry tried.

"And secondly, even if I did, I know I could fight it. I'm Secretary of State, god damn it! I am Elizabeth McCord, wife of the most incredible man and mother of the most amazing children, and if bullets and bombs in Iran won't stop me, cancer definitely won't." Elizabeth was sitting erect in her seat now, her eyes blazing passionately and one hand bracing herself on the dash.

Henry smiled slowly, "I love you."  
That wasn't the response she had been expecting from her husband but Elizabeth smiled back, "I love you, too." Elizabeth let herself advance forward, leaning into her him so that their lips were hovering just centimeters away from each other. He could feel her breath - erratic from the powerful speech she had just given and in an instant, their lips collided, their tongues battling for dominance, his hands roaming over her body like they were collecting the heat through her clothes. Henry reached his hand under her blouse and around her back, attempting to unclip her bra. Elizabeth stopped him suddenly, her hands pressed against his chest, her face flushed and damp. Cars were still honking, steadily.

"Let's go home," Elizabeth smiled.

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

Back at the house, Henry helped his sore wife from the car and up to the door where all three children were waiting.

"Oh my god, mom, are you okay?" Stevie cried, taking over helping her mother inside as the other two bombarded her with questions.

"Why did it take so long?" Jason asked.

"Didn't they just have to stitch you up, mom? That's what dad said on the phone, but then two hours went by and you guys didn't call, and" –

"Noodle. I'm sorry we didn't call," Elizabeth soothed, stopping her daughter's frenzied rambling, "I'm ok," she reassured, pulling her youngest daughter into her side, "I'm okay," she said again, this time to her whole family, all of who's eyes were fixed on her.

"We were so worried!" Alison bawled, tears springing to her eyes. She couldn't help but grab for her mother, throwing her arms around her. Elizabeth tried not to wince at her daughter's sudden physical embrace and Henry gently peeled his daughter from his wife, pulling her into him instead. Alison accepted his hold and melted into her father.

Stevie grabbed her mother's hand, "We really were…worried, that this," Stevie sniveled. Jason nodded and the family gently encompassed each other.

When they parted, Henry spoke up. "Your mother has had a really long day, you guys." They all nodded. "I think that it's best if she rests for the remainder of the day, gets some shut eye," he winked and squeezed his wife's hand, "What do you all think?"  
"We think that sounds good," Stevie answered quickly for them all, "Mom, you really need to rest and this time," she stopped and looked her mother dead in the eye, "This time, you actually need to rest…Not go out for "fresh air," not go feed the horses, and certainly not _ride_ the horses."  
Elizabeth smiled at her daughter's words. She was so grown up and it had happened in the blink of an eye. "I won't Stevie," she assured. "I love you guys," she called as she headed up the stairs to the bedroom with Henry at her side.

"We love you too, mom," Alison returned.

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

"We raised good kids, didn't we Henry?" Elizabeth asked. The couple was sharing a warm bath, Elizabeth propped up in front of her husband, his legs encircling her body protectively under the water, his hands kneading gently into her tense shoulders.

"That we did. That we did," Henry chuckled, kissing the hollow of Elizabeth's neck.

"I wasn't sure if I was going to be a good mother…"

"You're an amazing, mother," Henry offered quickly.

"But I wasn't _sure_ I would be. And I'm still not sure I am."  
"But _I_ was sure, and now…well now, there's no question," Henry answered, trying to be more assuring this time.

Elizabeth accepted her husband's response and was silent for a moment. "I feel like things are so up in the air, like I don't have a stable leg to stand on."

"I feel the same," he said, his voice hardly above a whisper.

"What are we going to do? Tomorrow's Monday…"

"Tomorrow is another day for you to rest," Henry corrected.

Elizabeth sighed and gripped her husband's shins under the water. "I hate not knowing what to do."

"Elizabeth," he assured, placing his hands on top of hers, "We will take this one day at a time. First, we need to know the results from your biopsy…"

"And how long did the doctor say that was going to be?"

"A few days…" Henry answered.

"A few days," Elizabeth repeated, "So…We wait?"

"So we wait."


	6. Chapter 6

Hey guys! You've reached the end of this story. Here, I present you with the final chapter. It was always meant to be a short multi-fic and I think I found the perfect place to end its journey. I hope you have enjoyed reading it as much as I have enjoyed writing it. Leave me some love!

Xx Kate

"B-R-O-K-E-N. Broken. Thirteen points being that "N" is a double letter," Stevie counted, "But, triple word score, that's 39, read it and weep, ladies and gentlemen." Stevie gave a little gesture of her hand and bowed her head, grinning wildly.

"Still doesn't beat my forty-two point word," Jason pointed out, scowling at his older sister.

"Well Jason, that doesn't quite matter because I'm still in the lead," Stevie countered, the grin still plastered on her smug face.

"Oh, shut up Stevie! You haven't won yet," Jason hollered, rolling his eyes dramatically.

"Jason, please," Henry chastised.

"Did we not teach these children how to be _gracious_ losers?" Elizabeth asked Henry from across the table.

"You didn't teach us how to be losers at all, mom," Alison answered for her father.

"Right." Elizabeth shook her head but a smile was hinting at her lips nonetheless.

" _Anyway_ ," Jason rushed, wanting his turn to come faster so he could triumph over his older sister, "Your turn now Alison."

"Well, this is honestly all I have," Alison shyly laid down three letters connecting her word to the one her sister had played. "S-I-C-K. I think that's sixteen points with the double letter score, better than nothing I guess," she pouted, not noticing the knowing glances that were being exchanged across the table between her parents. Elizabeth began to wring her hands under the table and Henry bit his lip nervously.

" _Dad_ , you're turn," an impatient Jason urged.

"Just give me a sec, Jason," Henry snapped startling all three of the children. Elizabeth eyed her husband and shook her head vehemently.

"Sorry, but let me just take a look at what I've got," Henry added, adjusting his tone to a milder approach. Henry studied his tiles for a few minutes then laid three more letters connecting to the "i" off of the word Alison had played. "F-I-N-E. Now that's only eleven points, but I'm _fine_ with that," he joked, winking at his children and again at his wife more meaningfully.

"Funny, dad," Stevie smirked.

"Won't be so funny when you lose," Jason cackled evilly, arranging his tiles on the rack in front of him. Henry wasn't paying attention though; he was too busy trying to communicate something to his wife who was still reeling from the mention of sickness. "It…will…be… _fine_ " He mouthed.

Elizabeth nodded quickly and blinked her tears away, "Now just wait a minute mister, I've still got my turn and I've got something that will knock even your sister out of this game."

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

"You know it's bad when a scrabble game can't even take your mind off of it," Henry joked, trying to lighten the mood as he helped Elizabeth climb into bed. Henry had suggested a nap after the game and Elizabeth had surprisingly accepted the proposal without a fight.

"You know, Henry, I really just want to know. One way or the other, I want to know… _right now_ ," Elizabeth huffed, completely ignoring the humor Henry was trying to bestow. Between the couple, the tables had truly turned in the last two days. It was now Tuesday afternoon and Elizabeth had grown impatient. She wanted to get up and go running, she wanted to move, she wanted to make love with her husband without her back seizing in pain, she wanted to go back to work, she wanted to _know if she had freaking cancer or not_ , but she couldn't do or know any of it and it was driving her absolutely mad. She had wanted to be the strong one for her and Henry, they had decided not to tell the children until they knew for sure, but she was finding it harder and harder to hold it together as the minutes ticked on.

As soon as it had happened, Henry had recognized the shift in his wife, he had seen her hard exterior crumble away and he had taken the reigns immediately. He was "the man beside the woman" and his woman was Elizabeth and she meant the world to him. He _would_ be strong for her. No more cursing, no more yelling, no more anger. Henry had decided in that moment that he would be the calm, collected, supportive husband that she so desperately needed him to be. The last few days had been difficult, snapping at his children during a friendly Scrabble match not being one of his finer moments, but at least he was trying.

"I want to know too, babe. We should have our answer by the end of the day," he assured, taking his wife's hand and kissing the inside of her palm.

Elizabeth sighed and let her husband remove her glasses and place them on the bedside table. "Wake me if the Doctor calls?"

"Of course."

MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS*MS

As it turned out, Henry didn't have to wake Elizabeth from her nap. The telephone ring shook her body to the core the moment it trilled from all the way downstairs in Henry's office. Elizabeth was up and propped against the pillows waiting anxiously before her husband even entered the room.

He wasn't surprised to see her awake. "It's Doctor Kelley," he whispered, covering the phone with one hand.

"Put it on speaker," Elizabeth murmured, barely able to form her words.

Henry sat on the edge of the bed and grabbed both of his wife's hands with one of his. "Okay Dr. Kelley, we're both here."

The Doctor cleared his throat audibly before he began to speak. "All right, let's get right to it. Elizabeth, Henry, we've gotten the results back from your biopsy and it appears to be…good news," he said. The smile was evident in his voice. Elizabeth squeezed Henry's hand and let out an audible gasp.

"Let me clarify Doctor, does that mean Elizabeth is cancer-free?"

"Yes. Yes it does. Your M/E ratios are fine and there was no detection of any abnormal cells. However, I did confirm with the differential that you still do have a high white blood cell count."

"But it's not cancer," Elizabeth clarified breathily, still in shock.

"No, it's not," Dr. Kelley responded.

"Then what is it?" Henry was still on edge.

"Well, TB tests came back negative as well, I saw no signs of infection when I re-stitched your back, so at this point I'd have to say my best guess would be stress. I'm sure that the Secretary of State, mother of three has no shortage of that?"

Elizabeth chuckled, "She does not."

"In any case, Elizabeth, my medical advice would be take it easy for the rest of the week, do things that relax you, try to avoid eating foods that are high in fats or sugars, and then call me if you have any other questions or concerns. How does that sound?"

Elizabeth let out a sob she'd been holding in, "It sounds great, Doctor. Thank you so much."

"Yes, thank you from both of us," Henry added, hovering over the phone.

"It was my pleasure," Dr. Kelley responded before they ended the call.

Elizabeth and Henry immediately embraced, the phone clattering to the floor and neither one caring.

"Thank god, thank god," Henry repeated over and over into his wife's hair.  
"Just stress," Elizabeth muttered, clinging onto her husband with desperation and relief.

"Nothing a week of rest can't fix," Henry sighed, kissing his wife's cheek tenderly.

"About that…" Elizabeth broke the embrace and bit her lip nervously.

"You're going back to work tomorrow, aren't you? You've already decided," Henry shook his head knowingly. He knew his wife too well.

"I'm going back to work tomorrow," she confirmed, a cheeky grin forming on her face.

"My wife, the fighter…the _stubborn_ fighter," he clucked, a grin to match hers appearing on his face as well.

"Like you said, Henry: it doesn't matter where you are or what you're doing – something could always happen. It can't stop us from living our lives…"

"I love you, Elizabeth: my brave, strong, independent wife. I am _so_ proud of you."

"I love you too, Henry McCord."

 _Fin_


End file.
